Wednesday, April 7, 2010

How to balance...?

I hate being Job's Comforter. Honestly I do. I hate it when I feel an irresistable urge to open my mouth to speak, before I've finished listening or before the person has gotten everything off his/her heart. I will feel bad about it, if I've been a bad listener. Or a judgmental one.

But...

But... but....

I think I get too emotionally involved in people's problems sometimes. I was going through the pastoral counseling class, and I couldn't help thinking to myself - I will probably never make a good, sound-minded counselor when it comes to dealing with depressed people. While I could be a good friend - give you a shoulder to cry on, encourage (perhaps) and even cry WITH you - I wouldn't be able to detach myself and look at your problem as a 'case' and help you look more rationally at the 'big picture'. (Ok, maybe, I feel super discouraged now, that's why I am so negative 'bout my ability to cope with people like that). And when I talk to a super depressed person who talks in a 'hopeless'-and-I've-given-up kind of tone and keeps ruminating on the same problem (just when you think she/he has found peace in God, she/he goes back to square one) - I will get affected myself...unless I ain't that close to her/him. Worse still if she/he is a loved one.

One depressed person talked to me today. I didn't know that this person was depressed, wasn't prepared to deal with it (was more like hoping for some light-hearted talk after my long day of doing my assignment)... and now, I am equally depressed...and am sorta reluctant to get up tomorrow morning to fact a new day. I know - I wasn't thinking that rationally when I told this person this: "Can you not laugh a little when you talk about your problem?" :S

Sorry for sounding heartless.

Grrrrrr.

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