It's weird.
I've been struggling with attacks of depression for the past week or so. It's not just being emo, I think. Alot of feeling helpless, worthless, hopeless, resentment sometimes, and such... sleep disturbances and unwillingness to both go to sleep/wake up, feeling fatigued and physically drained the next day, etc, etc. Sometimes, I cry myself to sleep. It's not just the weep-a-little-weep kind of thing. Tears come in torrents, and there is terrible ache deep down inside. Feel so abandoned somehow. Even while I write this, I'm tearing, and I don't understand why. I just don't understand it. Just makes me feel like I wanna run away. It really sucks.
SUCKS. (Sorry people:P)
My car's backside kena banged from behind today somemore. On my way home from work. By a four-wheel-drive. Thank God no big injury! When my car jolted, I nearly had a heart-attack! I thought that my backlight would have probably shattered - but it didn't. Just a small little dent above the left back-light. The person who banged my car quickly tukar-ed lane, and sped off. I did get down his car number plate though. Wondering if I should make a police report - but I shudder at the mar-fan-ness of doing that. So perhaps I'll just leave it. For now.
It's funny though how comfort came today. First Laura jie gave me a surprise long-distance call from Singapore. Then, while I was at choir practice, Han and tailo both texted me this 2 super random texts out of nowhere - I mean it was pretty unexpected, coz they hardly text me nowadays being extremely busy doctors in their respective State general hospitals...I teared reading their texts. Then, Zoey texted me in the night - and her text made me tear all over again.
I miss you guys so much. :'( Can I just turn back time?
Please pray for me, people. I need to overcome this.
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Depression
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5 comments:
First and foremost, lemme give you a big biggggggg hug!!!!
Neway, I say feel depression and feel it till the extend you'll come to a point of surrender that depression. Dear, you don't know how "lucky" you are to be the chosen one to go through difficult times for Jesus.
You know when i look at your life, i know all your sufferings are meant for Jesus to shine His glory. Never ever the world such as competitiveness and comparison to tear down your spirit to live for Jesus.
During this time of trials, know that it is a good thing for God to strengthen you :) God has a specific purpose and plan for your life. Storms are temporary setbacks in that purpose. Absolutely nothing can change God's ultimate purpose for your life unless you choose to disobey Him. I'm confident you wouldn't, grace :)(It's not my expectations/pressure towards you). Above all, i see a heart desiring for His perfect will be done.
Beneath all those you know about yourself that you don't like, God sses an Israel. He sees the princess in your life. He sees what you can become. He sees your potential, an He wants to change you from a Jacob to an Israel. Let God do the changing.
I wait in anticipation for God's promises to come to pass. I now rejoice with you, although time is difficult, fret not, God knows and He really knows...
His Love is the Greatest Gift of All :)
Hey Meng Huey, I've suffered through depression on and off, and it really does suck. I hope you come out of it stronger, and that you have support from the people you need in your life.
Take care. :)
Grace sorry i can't do much except keep u in prayers, but i believe you can overcome this..simply because you are Grace.
My Cookies dearest,
Breaks my heart to see you go through such pain & sadness. You know I'm here for you if you need someone to talk to or even pass you tissue ok? I know this will go pass quickly. Be strong and stay focus to your mission. Will definitely keep you in prayers
{{{{{{MAJOR PIGGY HUG}}}}}}}}
*muaks*
hi, sorry to hear that ur car got another accident, and well, thank god u're alright...
and well, the path of life will never be easy, the process of growing up is gonna go thru a lot of leaps and bumps.......life never complete without challenges right? what a boring life if every time everything just happen so smooth and flat
today's challenge will be tomorrow's weapon. the hardship you undergone will determine how you settle and handle the incoming and awaiting troubles later. today you only can defend but tomorrow you can attack after you learn the tricks
good luck and have a nice day
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